Let's Start a Singles Group!!

Oh those words...Let's start a singles group. It follows the vast discussion of what to do with those non married people that come to church alone. Sit in the pew with their high tech gadgets taking notes feverishly. Then after getting their half hugs or a squeeze on the shoulder they trek out to their lonely car and are never heard of again...until next Sunday.

What most people do not understand...is that a Singles Group in a church is even harder to do than a youth group. Youth group kids usually don't have many friends outside of the church. So to them going to church is getting to see all their friends. For a single person woman or man...we have friends from work, college, and other social interactions that sometimes coincide with midweek church service. This makes our appearances more sporadic. So when a rigid schedule is put on a singles groups, for example we are going to meet every Thursday, alarms go off in my head!! Wait! I have networking happy hours on Thursdays, not mention art gallery opening happen on Tuesday, as well as the phrase, Thursdays are just not good for me. Nevertheless, once the schedule has been abated and agreed upon, the next point of business is, who is going to teach the class?

For some reason, singles groups are lead by older couples that have teen to adult children. I guess...they should know how to be single in a secular world where everything is tolerated, and friends come from all walks of life. MAYBE IF THEY WERE HIPPIES (No offense to hippies or self proclaimed hippies, I love you all). However, I find that their approach to teaching singles is the equivalent of talking to their children. If I wanted to talk to my parents I would have. Singles group is a time to vent out your frustrations of being a single woman in a safe haven where other women are going,  "I know exactly what you mean." It should be a time where you don't have to sit around and smile at the married ladies swapping children's stories and texting pictures of their family vacation to Disney world. It is a time where you can get the support and understanding, that you are having thoughts of having sex with the next guy that smiles your way. It is a time to understand that having a glass of wine is not boozing it up, but winding down from a very long, tough day at the office.

I get very excited and passionate about this subject because, for some reason churches and church organizations are all about the children (yes I know they are our future), or all about the youth (also another part of our scary future), but do they sit down and take a look at the valuable resource of a singles group could be? You basically have a group of adults (yes adults) that are young enough (I am talking mid 20's to early 30's, kids right out of high school don't count) to volunteer where needed. The issue is how to organize. I believe organizations forget that young singles are actually very busy. It may be with friends. It may be with work, but they are busy. In order to take advantage, of this important resource, scheduling is important. Let us know a head of time when this event is taking place, not sometime or around the 12th, but an actual date. Also allow the singles to be flexible.Sometimes meeting on a Saturday at 3:00pm may work for us. Don't be too rigid. Third be patient and consistent. If we can't come the first time or even the second time, keep on trying...the third time might be the charm that we decide we can come. It might not be as much as possible, but we will make for dang sure that it is on our calendar.